i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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