Swine flu. Run for my life!
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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