i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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