you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
