I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
