What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
