hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
