I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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