my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
