i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I intend to get homeless drunk
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
