Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
