At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
