my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
