Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
