Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
