You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
