just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
