well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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