i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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