Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
