bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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