I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
