You really coming over, don't trick.
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
