i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize
