i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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