Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
