Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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