For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
