It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
