I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
