I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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