I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
