she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
