Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
