Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize