Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
