try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
