One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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