You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
