just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I skipped work to stalk him.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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