i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
