She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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