And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
