Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
