Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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