You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Boobs speak an international language.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
