THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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