just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
