Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
