I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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